Reinventing, Re-grouping, Reclaiming

I just recently had a birthday. This particular birthday ushered in a new me. With more than a half century under my belt, it was time to reinvent my life and restore balance. Why was this birthday more special and note-worthy for me? I believe it's because I retired this year from a rewarding, demanding and challenging career as a public school principal. I spent the last 25 years of my life serving others...children...teachers...parents...communities. In the latter years of my career, I forgot how important it was to keep my life balanced and take care of myself. I gained a lot of weight, added several prescription medications to my medicine cabinet, and abandoned my spiritual life all because I gave everything I had within me to everything other than myself. And, I finally collapsed physically, mentally and spiritually. The meds I took were for depression, anxiety, high blood pressure, acid reflux, and high cholesterol...all stress induced conditions of the body and mind. Through a healthy change in lifestyle, I have been able to drop several of those medications.

During the last 9 months I have turned inward to answer the question, "who am I...really?" My self-analysis encouraged me to begin purging bad habits and bad thinking...I began to question and evaluate other areas of my life such as, what were my failures? What would I do differently if given the opportunity? Did I do my best...give all that I could? Was I loved...did I love in return? Did I run the race and soar like an eagle? Did I live a balanced life? The answers to those questions gave me insight into how I intend to spend the remaining 50+ years on this earth.

How does one go about reinventing themselves? My experience included being lost for awhile, waiting in solitude for something "new" to do. I was no longer the one sought after to solve problems and fix things. I wasn't responsible for making things happen or being the bottom line. It was scary being all by myself and contemplating these things. I learned there was a difference between a Human Being and a Human Doer. You see, I was a great Human Doer. I prided myself in being a Human Doer. Someone had to do it, and I was good at it. Now, I am content being "just me" again.

The reinventing of myself has included changing my diet, exercising, and spiritual renewal. I know what I want, and I'm going after it. I want to be healthy in body, mind and spirit. Instead of reading "how to get better test scores", I now read inspirational books by Beth Moore, Max Lucado and Joyce Meyer, just to name a few. I've learned how to be "quiet". I know I am loved...loved by the Creator. I know I am worthy just being me...not because of what I do, but because of who I am...a child of God.

My creative side has blossomed again after many dormant years. I am adding order and warmth to my home. My friends and family have often told me I have a knack for putting things together in my home in interesting and pleasing ways. My home is very eclectic because I love so many different things and styles. I enjoy making flower arrangements with the wild flowers surrounding my home. I love making beaded jewelry which includes beads from old jewelry found in antique stores and my mother's and grandmother's old jewelry boxes. I often change the personality of my home with colors that I love (even if they don't always go together), my diverse collections of art and family photos. I have a closet in my home totally devoted to things I find that I "might have a use for someday"; these things appear and disappear from the rooms in my home seemingly as often as the wind blows. I am redefining spaces that fit my new life style. I am regularly attending church again. I entertain family and friends again and am bonding with my new granddaughter. I have seen her reach her first-year milestones...what a privilege that has been! I have reconnected with high school girlfriends and am learning to blog! I am living the life I missed for so many years and am grateful for this opportunity to live a simple life again.

It is my hope that you can relate to my story and that you will share your life with me. Are you reinventing your life...are you entering a new stage of life? Do you find peace with yourself, or are you struggling like I did in the beginning? Maybe we can help each other.